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Although rare in our society, several families or generations sometimes live together, whether by economic necessity or by choice. In this arrangement, accommodations and modifications for the person with spinal injury must be agreed to by all involved, and you’ll have to educate family members about your needs. On the other hand, you’ll have more thinking power and perhaps more willing hands to get things done.
The story of siblings Naomi Shoemaker and Jason Fleckenstein provides an inspiring example of intergenerational living.
Naomi and Jason were young adults with children of their own when they were injured in separate, unrelated car accidents, about two and a half years apart. Both injuries resulted in quadriplegia. Naomi, separated from her husband at the time of the accident, moved with her three children into her parents’ home. Jason, separated from his wife, was already living there. His six-year-old son visited the family after school, returning to his mother’s house at night.
Naomi and Jason’s parents, Victor and Patsy, provide a home for their adult children and their grandchildren, and Patsy acts as personal care attendant. Victor works full time and helps out at home in the evenings. Living under one roof saves money on resources that would have to be duplicated if Naomi and Jason lived alone. The family borrowed money to install a basement exit and indoor wheelchair lift for Jason’s basement quarters, as well as an outside backup lift.
After the first newspaper article about their unusual situation, the family was flooded with donations from strangers and from acquaintances in the community. Victor’s union organized a four-state fund drive and set up a trust fund to provide for Naomi’s and Jason’s care when their parents are no longer able to do so. The union local also secured donations from an anonymous benefactor, including a small bus to transport the multigenerational family and a voice-activated computer to help Jason and Naomi explore home-based business opportunities.
This ordinary working-class family has met unusual adversity with a “can-do” attitude. With the help of their community, they’ve turned a potentially tragic situation into an opportunity for mutual support and growth. Though Naomi and Jason depend on their own parents for physical assistance, they are able to be full parents for their own children, providing love, guidance, teaching, discipline, help with homework, and setting of limits. All family members, including the children, help out as much as they can. With the physical and emotional contributions of each generation, and the economic and practical assistance of their community, this family has made multigenerational living work.
Job said, “Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?” (Job 2:10). It is a given that we will suffer. It is a given that God will discipline us if we need it. 1 Peter 4:12,13 says,
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
This advice is certainly not what we hear from our mothers, friends, counselors, psychologists, psychiatrists, or our hair dressers! Think of a situation at work or in your marriage that casts you in the role of the underdog. Did your friends and colleagues make you focus only on yourself as the victim? Did they make you feel like it was something strange happening to you, and that you needed to take care of yourself? The world will tell you emphatically that you must indulge or take care of yourself, for no one else will. That lie has permeated even the church and is one of the biggest lies of Satan. But the Apostle Peter says not to be surprised when you suffer, and it is not if you will suffer but when you will suffer.
Nothing is strange about suffering being a part of the lot of our life, and nothing is strange about not wanting to suffer. But Jesus said that there was a cost to embracing his lifestyle. “And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple”. There are some people who do not even know they are to pick up their cross, and there are some people who put their crosses down or even put their crosses on the backs of others. But this verse says that they cannot be a Christ-follower, a Christian, a disciple of Jesus, if they are not willing to pick up suffering or self-denial (the same thing) and carry it with them. Christ’s followers must be willing to embrace pain—there is no backing out. And the pain is painful! Hebrews 12:11a tells us, “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful.” Suffering is not unique to you; it is normal, but it is painful.
Your cross, by the way, is not your mother-in-law. She is an opportunity for you to show love, not a cross to bear. Bearing your cross means laying down your will and doing God’s. Even Jesus prayed with sweat drops of blood as He surrendered His will to God’s: “Not my will but yours be done”.
God made us one way by nature. “Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me”. Yet He asks, calls, or destines us to go another way. To embrace changing our self is to embrace growing pains. Just like children, we too were programmed to desire to grow up, but the intermittent pain that comes with accepting more responsibility is uncomfortable. However, staying immature is even more painful.
The stage of anatomy and physiology is the onset of sexual excitement. The first sign of sexual arousal in the female is the secretion of the lubricating fluid by the vagina. The vaginal lubrication occurs within 10 to 30 seconds after sexual stimulation in normal women. (The first sign of arousal in the male is erection of the penis.) Dr. Masters calls it ‘the sweating reaction of the vagina’. Just as beads of perspiration appear on the face, in the same way beads of moisture appear on the inner vaginal wall and coalesce (unite) to form the lubricating fluid. However, if the sexual stimulation by the male is not of the right kind, the vagina remains dry and the usual moistening is absent. Innumerable impatient males try to enter a woman’s dry vagina. Not only is such an entry difficult for him hut it causes the woman intense physical pain and emotional disturbances. It is essential for the male to stimulate her mons area with the finger until she is moist before he enters her.
Many women will have hot flushes and night sweats at around the time of the menopause. Hot flushes can start as a feeling of heat in the face, neck or body and the heat can spread up or down. These can be experienced in different ways. Women may have no outward signs of redness or sweating, or may sweat profusely and become extremely red in the face. Some women may react with palpitations, others just experience a general feeling of increased body heat as if somebody had raised their body temperature. Equally some women find the hot flushes very uncomfortable, whilst others may just find them inconvenient.
No one really knows what causes the hot flushes. One theory suggests that they are triggered by falling levels of oestrogen. Another theory considers that it is the higher levels of FSH that are the trigger. Hot flushes are termed ‘vasomotor’ symptoms because the size of the blood vessels changes as part of the body’s temperature-control system. Blood vessels dilate, that is get larger, to allow more blood through the vessels in order to cool us down. It is that automatic mechanism, for instance, that makes us sweat on a hot day. After a flush, many women feel cold and shivery, and after taking off layers of clothes, want to put them back on again. These flushes can occur many times during the day and last from just a few seconds to thirty minutes. At night, the flushes are called night sweats and a woman may wake up to find herself drenched in sweat and need to dry herself and change her night clothes. As the night sweats are constantly waking her up, her pattern of sleep becomes disturbed, resulting in tiredness, depression and irritability. Most of us would feel like this if we were woken up a number of times each night!
Include a minimum of 600 milligrams of calcium each day. Scientists in Canada found that people who consumed more than 600 milligrams of calcium each day roughly the amount in a cup of broccoli, a half-cup of cottage cheese, or a container of yogurt, had lower body fat than those who consumed less than 600 milligrams a day.
Robert Heaney, a calcium researcher at Creighton University in Omaha, made a startling observation. He notes that most women have a tendency to gain weight in their midsections in midlife, typically a half-pound to a pound each year. Those who consumed 1,000 to 1,300 milligrams of calcium from food (not supplements) had a weight gain of – zero!
Michael Zmetel, chairman of the Department of Nutrition at the University of Tennessee, believes there is a relationship between calcium and body fat because “a high-calcium diet suppresses calcitrol, a hormone that signals fat cells to make more fat and burn less fat.” So, if you suppress the hormone, you will make less fat and burn more fat. Simple.
Increase your calcium consumption in low-fat, low-calorie dairy. That is why my plan includes low-fat yogurt, low-fat cottage cheese, low-fat and low-calorie cheese, soy products, broccoli, and other foods high in calcium. Nutritionists generally recommend 1,000 milligrams of calcium per day for adults up to age fifty.
Treatment of acne involves a total management programme rather than the use of one particular cream.
Cleansing the skin
When the skin is cleaned dirt and surface bacteria are removed. In acne, however, the pathology lies deep below the skin’s surface in the sebaceous glands which are not affected by regular cleansers or soaps. The skin should be cleansed once or twice daily but harsh products should be avoided. Acne skin is already inflamed and sore and harsh soaps and anti-bacterial cleansers will only irritate it more.
Suitable mild soaps include Almay cleansing bar, Clinique cleansing bar and Neutrogena for oily skin, while liquid, non-oily cleansers such as Cetaphil Lotion, Almay foaming cleanser and Yardley foaming cleanser can also be used. Anti-bacterial soaps are of no benefit and are too drying. However, special anti-acne washes which contain benzoyl peroxide and penetrate into the sebaceous glands do help to reduce the number of propionibacterium acnes. These washes include Oxywash and Paramet. Although they are helpful, they must be used cautiously to avoid excessive irritation.
Cleansing granules and buff puffs should be avoided as they only irritate the skin. Toners dry out excessive oil but tend to burn skin which is already inflamed. They are of little benefit and often produce excessive dryness. Cleansing masks are often advocated for acne skin. Although they absorb oil, they usually have no real therapeutic effect and can significantly irritate the skin.
Picking and squeezing acne lesions
Acne lesions are inflammatory and therefore should not be picked or squeezed. This will only spread and deepen the inflammation and may lead to scarring. People who have only blackheads, however, will often benefit from manual extraction. Beauticians are often very skilled in extracting blackheads and whiteheads, but red lumps and pusy heads should not be pricked. Neither should moisturizers be used after blackhead removal as they will only block the pores again.
There has been a lot of interest in the last decade in the effect of light on human health. Biologists have discovered that not only is it vital for our well-being, but also that individual requirements for light vary as much as individual needs for vitamins. As humans have become more civilized they have spent less time outdoors; many people travel to work by car to badly-lighted buildings and then return home by car to spend an evening indoors watching television. We do not wilt visibly like plants in a dark corner, but there is no doubt that the shorter days of the autumn and winter do adversely affect some people. They experience lethargy, loss of interest in sex, and depression; as daylight increases in the spring these feelings disappear and normal energy levels return. While many people can say they feel a little let down in the winter, there are some people who are so seriously affected by light reduction that they have a condition known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). Sufferers become extremely depressed, have joint pains and digestive problems, crave sweet foods and lack concentration sometimes to the extent that they cannot continue their studies or work. They have great difficulty getting out of bed in the mornings and are exhausted all day.
Fortunately it has been found that being exposed to light which replicates daylight for several hours a day cures this condition. When this light, or real daylight, enters the eye it stimulates the pineal gland and inhibits the production of a substance called melatonin. Normally melatonin is only produced at night in the dark; this is what makes us sleepy.
Daylight is necessary for normal brain functioning and for the regulation of the sleep-wake cycle, so you can see that staying indoors when you are depressed or ill in any way can only compound your problems. Even if you are severely agoraphobic you could sit at an open window without any glasses; do this for a minimum of twenty minutes daily in the brightest part of the day.
This milk-based formula takes account of the fact that human milk is richer in whey, lactose, vitamin C, niacin, and long-chain polyunsaturated fatty acids compared to cow’s milk but leaner in casein (milk protein). The addition of gelatin to cow’s milk formula will make it more digestible for the infant. Use only truly expeller-expressed oils in the formula recipes, otherwise they may lack vitamin E.
The ideal milk for baby, if the infant cannot be breast-fed, is clean, whole raw milk from old-fashioned cows, certified free of disease, that feed on green pasture. If the only choice available to you is commercial milk, choose whole milk, preferably organic and unhomogenized, and culture it with a pima or kefir culture to restore enzymes.
2 cups whole milk preferably unprocessed milk from pasture-fed cows 1/4 cup homemade liquid whey (See recipe for whey, below) 4 tablespoons lactose (2 or more tablespoons good quality cream (not ultrapasteurized), more if you are using milk from Holstein cows 1 teaspoon cod liver oil 1 teaspoon expeller-expressed sunflower oil
1 teaspoon extra virgin olive 611
2 teaspoons coconut oil
2 teaspoons Frontier brand nutritional yeast flakes 2 teaspoons gelatin 17/8 cups filtered water 1 teaspoon acerola powder
Add gelatin to water and heat gently until gelatin is dissolved. Place all ingredients in a very clean glass or stainless steel container and mix well. To serve, pour 6 to 8 ounces into a very clean glass bottle, attach nipple and set in a pan of simmering water.
Makes about 36 ounces
This liver-based formula also mimics the nutrient profile of mother’s milk. It is extremely important to include coconut oil in this formula as it is the only ingredient that provides the special medium-chain saturated fats found in mother’s milk. As with, the milk-based formula, all oils should be truly expeller-expresse
3 3/4 cups homemade beef or chicken broth 2 ounces organic liver, cut into small pieces 5 tablespoons lactose 1 teaspoon bifidobacterium infantis 1/4 cup homemade liquid whey (See recipe for whey))
1 tablespoon coconut oil, 1 teaspoon cod liver oil
Heat until warm but not hot to the touch, shake bottle well and feed baby. (Never, never heat formula in a microwave oven!) Note: If you are using the Lact-Aid, mix all ingredients well in a
Fiber: Adequate fiber is an essential part of any healthful diet. Choosing vegetables and salads from the low-carbohydrate foods list will provide you with a fine fiber-rich program for those two meals. For your Reward Meal, you may select any fiber-rich food, including vegetables or any of the grains. Among our favorites is popcorn.
Condiments: At Low-Carbohydrate Meals (as well as the Reward Meal) you may use bouillon, consomm?, all herbs, vinegar, mustard, olives, pepper, salt, soy sauce, garlic, garlic or onion powder, hot sauce, and white horseradish. Avoid or limit catsup and relish.
Breads and cereals: Do not eat any of your usual breads, pancakes, cereals, or other breads and grains at your Low-Carbohydrate Meals. Even small amounts of most breads and cereals eaten at times other than during the hour of your Reward Meal will increase your insulin level, along with your appetite and your weight. However, we have provided recipes for special, low-carbohydrate alternatives.
Beverages: You may drink unlimited quantities of carbonated water, seltzer, club soda, or black coffee or tea.
Diet soda that has no fruit juice added is also acceptable. Read the label: if it contains more than four grams of carbohydrates per serving, avoid the drink except during your Reward Meal. You may add about two tablespoons of lime or lemon juice to tea or club soda.
If you prefer your coffee with milk or cream, you may have one cup of coffee each day with up to about two ounces of milk, cream or half-and-half. Cream substitute is also acceptable—if it contains two grams of carbohydrates or less per serving. Read the label. Be sure to complete your coffee within fifteen minutes.
Add sugar only at Reward Meals. Any sugar substitute that you use must have no more than two carbohydrate grams per serving.
All alcoholic beverages should be consumed during your Reward Meal only.
Fruits: Do not eat any fruits or drink any fruit juices except at your Reward Meal. Although fruit and fruit juices are healthful foods, consuming them even in small amounts can result in high insulin levels. High insulin levels, in turn, will almost certainly produce a hunger, a desire for more carbohydrates, and a slowing or stopping of your weight loss.
You may use one or two tablespoons of lime or lemon juice in tea, soda, or in cooking, at your Low-Carbohydrate Meals.
Drink Plenty of Water
Be sure to drink six to eight glasses of water or other noncaloric liquid each day. This is particularly important because many carbohydrate addicts do not drink enough liquids and may think they are craving foods when their bodies are actually thirsty.
Water is essential to your continued good health—drink at least six glasses daily.
In many ways you may feel like a passive bystander during your acute hospitalization, and in some ways you are. There you are, immobilized cared for, having things done to you and for you. Now it is time to begin investigating what medical choices you and your family can make.
Although you may seem to have few choices, in reality you are always the arbiter of your treatment. Remember that you, the patient, are also the consumer of services and have the obligation to understand the treatment and to determine whether the service is satisfactory. Don’t hesitate to ask questions about your care, and ask again and again if you don’t understand the answers. You are very dependent on your doctors and nurses at the beginning of your recovery, but you’ll gradually become a partner in the management of your own care. Again, remember that the hospital staff is working for you and it is their job to take care of you both emotionally and physically. You have the final say about what tests you undergo and what procedures are performed. If you do not understand why a test is necessary, ask for an explanation.