Natural Health and Herbal Remedies Blog

All the natural methods or rhythm methods involve abstinence during that part of the menstrual cycle when fertilization is possible. They are now barely used except by practising catholics, to whom other contraceptive methods are forbidden.

The difficulty lies in determining the non-fertile days.

As the menstrual cycle is often irregular, one is obliged to take a wide safety margin, and this disrupts the couple’s sex life.

The Ogino method (75 to 85% effective) For women with a regular 28-day cycle, ovulation occurs between the 13th and 17th days of the cycle. In addition, sperm can survive up to four days in a woman’s genital system, so the first dangerous day is not the thirteenth but the ninth. And as the ovule can be fertilized up to a day after ovulation, the dangerous period lasts up to the eighteenth day. The couple must therefore abstain from all vaginal intercourse for at least nine days.

For irregular cycles (the most common) this period has to be prolonged even further.

As one can see, therefore, this method is very risky. It may suit a couple who would not consider pregnancy a great disaster, but it must not be used in cases where pregnancy must be avoided at all costs.

The temperature method

This can be combined with the Ogino method to help shorten the period of abstinence after ovulation. A woman’s temperature drops by about two-tenths of a degree at the moment of ovulation, rises again twenty-four hours later by about three-tenths of a degree, and stabilizes at this level until menstruation starts. The infertile phase starts on the fourth day of high temperature. One has of course to make sure that the rise in temperature is not due to any other cause.

The cervical mucus method

This is another supplement to the Ogino method. It involves observing changes in the appearance of the cervical mucus. This thick, opaque mucus is found in small quantities at the neck of the womb. At ovulation it increases in volume and becomes a clear fluid. Then it returns to its original appearance until the onset of menstruation.

Obviously these methods are not very certain. Moreover, when they do fail there is a higher risk of abnormality in the foetus, because the sperm and egg have met towards the end of their useful lives.

Coitus interruptus – the withdrawal method (60 to 80% effective)

This involves the man withdrawing his penis just before ejaculation. The high failure rate is due to the fact there can sometimes be sperm in the slight liquid discharge just before orgasm. The method is also very often frustrating, because the man’s orgasm is not really satisfying, and the woman often does not have time to reach hers unless the man is able to hold back long enough.

The vaginal douche

This is a rubber bulb with a nozzle designed to flush out the sperm. It is not a bad precaution but it is not very effective. It also does away with the moment of peace and relaxation women appreciate so much after lovemaking.

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The word “paedophilia” means love of children – which would be a very worthy sentiment if it were not a perverse sexual love and a crime in the eyes of the law.

It is a mistake to assume that the paedophile rapes children. Most paedophiles never do more than caress the child and touch or show their genitals. If caught, they are charged with indecent exposure, indecent assault or corruption of minors.

The typical characteristics of the paedophile are weakness and timidity. He shrinks from relationships with mature women for fear of being dominated rather than dominant. With a little girl everything seems easier, even if he does not go all the way to full sexual relations. Little girls are generally submissive because of their upbringing in the family. And they are innocent: in other words they have little awareness of the notions of good and evil. It is this that attracts the paedophile.

A paedophile is generally of a gentle and unaggressive nature. He rarely uses coercion to have his way with a child. He merely takes advantage of the child’s naivety, of the fact that she does not know what is “allowed” and what is not. In most cases she also trusts the paedophile because he is someone known to her – a family friend, or someone she has met in normal, everyday circumstances. He may be a priest, a teacher or a sports instructor, for example.

Paedophilia is not specific to heterosexuals or homosexuals; a paedophile may be interested in boys, girls or both.

Paedophilia is a typically male perversion. Even so, there is a point to be made here that shows very clearly how are judgements are twisted by moral conceptions. A woman can freely hug, kiss, caress and dandle a young child without anyone thinking it odd. But a man does not have that freedom to express affection: he will immediately be seen as a paedophile even if he has no sexual thoughts in mind.

Be this as it may, parents are strongly recommended to put their children on guard against this kind of encounter, and explain the reasons – though the explaining is hard to do and is very often neglected.

Paedophilia, like homosexuality, is difficult to cure. The paedophile has not chosen to be that way. He is a victim of impulses he cannot control. The most he can do is to try and integrate into adult society. If he manages this and has good sexual relations with adults, his paedophile tendencies may fade into the background or die out altogether.

Paedophilia in the family may be far more common than is generally recognized. Beyond the normal physical expression of affection and tenderness between parent and child, there is a whole range of possible activities, even without going as far as intercourse or coercive “child abuse” in the proper sense.

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The most spectacular variation on the dildo theme is the vibrator, used by homosexuals and heterosexuals alike, and by no means only for solitary masturbation. Many couples use vibrators in addition to other stimulation methods.

Vibrators come in very many forms, all more or less based on the penis. In use, the shape is of little importance; it is merely residual phallic fetishism that requires the penis shape. Experience shows that in fact women rarely insert them into their vaginas or anuses, but almost always use them to touch lightly on external areas.

The vibrator has a motor inside which produces fast vibrations, mainly concentrated in the tip. In contact with the skin this vibration stimulates muscles and nerve endings alike, and also draws a flow of blood to the area stimulated.

Vibrators can be used to stimulate all the erogenous zones: the breasts, between the buttocks, the inner and outer labia, the vaginal opening and, above all, the clitoris. In fact the vibration stimulates too intensely to be used on the “button”; it is best to run the tip of the vibrator up and down the shaft of the clitoris, using only light pressure.

There are special two-headed models for simultaneous stimulation of clitoris and vagina or vagina and anus. Others have interchangeable heads designed for the different erogenous zones.

There is no need to list the possible applications of the vibrator in these pages – the reader will easily find the uses that best match his or her tastes.

Couples make relatively little use of the vibrator. There is a certain prejudice against it, which is perhaps justified: who needs a machine when nature has endowed us with all kinds of moving parts for the purpose – hands, fingers, lips, tongue and penis?

It is only reasonable, then, that couples should use the vibrator just for an occasional thrill. But it can be very useful in solitary masturbation, or for women who rarely reach a climax with other stimulation methods. In fact sex therapists consider the vibrator a major invention, and recommend its use in treating serious orgasm problems for which no other kind of treatment exists.

On the other hand most of the welter of weird gadgets to be found in the shops serve no very useful purpose and are in doubtful taste.

Sex shops are not the only place one can find sex aids, of course. People on their own and couples in search of variety find uses for all sorts of everyday objects from paint brushes, spoons, brush handles, bottles and candles to carrots, cucumbers, leeks and bananas. And those who enjoy sado-masochistic games can replace the panoply of sex shop gadgets with slippers, table tennis bats, rulers, belts, rope etc.

Men use few aids for themselves. They get little sensation from a vibrator, for example, except in and around the anus. There are small vibrators designed for anal stimulation, and strings of beads about a centimetre across, which are inserted into the anus; at the moment of orgasm, the man or his partner gently pulls the beads out one by one.

Many men insert objects of various kinds into their anuses. Sometimes they are unable to get them out again, as hospital casualty wards well know – so much so that a special type of surgical forceps has had to be designed to remove such objects!

Another sex aid used by men is the inflatable doll, though this is little more than a masturbation aid.

Men also sometimes use a penis ring. This is a large rubber ring which which can be slid down the penis to the base. The effect is to halt the flow of blood out of the glans and penis; the resulting congestion helps produce an erection, or at least helps to keep it up longer. If the ring is too tight, the glans can swell up and turn purple. Some such rings are provided with a knob or projection designed to touch the clitoris when the penis is deep in the vagina.

One kind of variation on the penis ring is the ampallang, especially used by Africans. The ampallang is a ring fixed around the penis at the base of the glans, with feathers, small pieces of animal fur or suitable ticklers of vegetable origin, designed to stimulate the vagina walls more actively than the penis on its own.

There are other attachments of various sorts and sizes that men can slip onto their penises. They are really only variations on the dildo theme, though some also have a projection at the base to stimulate the clitoris during intercourse.

Another aid, not in very common use, is the “Geisha ball”, a kind of small ping-pong ball which women can place between their labia. Inside is a smaller ball which rolls about as she moves, setting up delicious vibrations through the whole genital area.

And for a very different type of accessory, there is the “Victorian table”, so called because of its popularity in Victorian England. This was a low table with holes in the top, designed to let through a woman’s breasts or a man’s penis, providing for all sorts of erotic or sado-masochistic fantasies. When the table was not in use, the owner would hide the holes under ornaments or potted plants!

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Yes indeed. And it is not enough to be aware of the differences. One must bear them in mind and adapt one’s behaviour accordingly.

For example:

There is no such creature as a man who cannot reach orgasm.

A man experiences only one kind of orgasm. A woman may experience three, simultaneously or one after the other: clitoral, vaginal and G-spot.

A man’s orgasm may be very brief. A woman’s never is.

Another difference, psychological this time, stems from the fact that a woman as such is an object of desire to a man, and is aware of this. Except for certain cases, the reverse is not true. As a result, both men and women sometimes wonder who is giving who the pleasure.

In other words, when a woman caresses a man and arouses and stimulates him sexually, the man knows she is doing it for his pleasure. But when a man fondles and stimulates a woman, she may feel he is doing it for his own pleasure as much as for hers. And she may come to feel she is just a sex object. This leads to disunity or misunderstanding in many couples.

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Bernard and Monica have been living together for a month, and their happiness is a joy to behold. Never the least argument, perfect harmony.

One morning when they wake up they kiss and fondle each other as usual. At a certain moment Bernard gets to his knees, his back against the head of the bed; Monica sees his erect penis close to her face. Bernard strokes her hair, slips his hand under her chin and lifts it a little. But when he tries to bring his penis towards her mouth, she draws back. Bernard can see she is going to get upset, and does not insist. The couple continue their caresses and make love in the usual way.

Over the next few days the incident seems to be forgotten, but in fact it has lingered in both their minds. Bernard is wishing Monica had not refused, while Monica tries to justify her refusal in her own mind.

In this kind of situation – and every couple has been through one – one or other of the partners has to change his or her behaviour in the long run. If the man pretends it was just an unimportant, passing fancy that will not arise again, he will either feel deprived of what he regards as a legitimate pleasure, or he will go and satisfy his desire with a more broadminded woman. If the woman tells herself she ought to make an effort to satisfy a desire she continues to regard as a perversion, she will be making a concession rather than a gesture of love.

In either case, it is a fair bet that the couple will not last very long. The lovers will experience other, similar situations, and the accumulation of refusals and concessions will in the long run lead to chronic discord.

Most causes of disunity in the couple would disappear if both partners had a full knowledge of everything to do with sex and could get rid of a certain number of taboos and wrong ideas.

Every man and woman ought to acquire this knowledge. The notion of the man as initiator in sexual matters is now long out of date. Every girl should be sufficiently well-informed to be able feel joy rather than shock at what awaits her when she shares a bed with a boy. On the other hand the man who supposedly initiates her very often knows no more than she does, and runs the risk of seeming demanding and domineering.

The notion of initiation is in any case ambiguous. It could be defined as the transmission of knowledge from one person who knows to another person who does not know. But this defines teaching better than it does initiation.

Speaking of sexuality in a situation where both partners already have a full, objective theoretical knowledge, initiation is better defined as the exploration and application of this theoretical knowledge.

Under this definition, neither partner is subordinate to the other. The couple initiate themselves, together, into sexual activity, and try to strike a balance in their sexual relationship.

This balance in sexual activity may vary widely from couple to couple. That is only natural; it would be quite unnatural if all couples behaved exactly the same in their moments of intimacy.

Such a balance is essential for building the solid ties that are desirable between two lovers. To achieve it, one must start by communicating. This seems obvious, yet few couples make a habit of talking about sex.

If you want a fulfilling sex life, without those clouds of resentment that gradually accumulate over the months and years, you should take every opportunity to tackle sexual problems in your conversations, right from the start of your relationship.

This has to be done with delicacy. It is not a good idea to ask your lover point-blank what she thinks about sodomy when you have only known her for eight days; she will probably say she would rather talk about something else. If you persist, she will probably say that on the face of it she is against it. And unless you are looking for new and exciting ways to provoke a scene, you had better not ask why. This does not mean sodomy cannot be a good topic 0f conversation: one just has to choose the moment and the circumstances to raise the subject.

It is better to start with very general questions that will help you find out at the outset whether you and your partner are made for each other. Perhaps you will agree 0n everything; if so, then all to the good. But you are more likely to have different opinions on some points. That is why it is worth discussing. Sometimes you will change to the other person’s viewpoint because you honestly see you were wrong. More often each of you will take a step towards the other, and you will reach some agreement midway between your two conceptions. This does not mean each making a concession towards the other; it means each acknowledging what is right and true in the other’s ideas.

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The word ‘epilepsy’ means ‘seizure.’ Epileptics are characterized by a loss of consciousness, momentary or prolonged, and involuntary, convulsive movements. Some people call this a fit. An epileptic seizure is the result of a temporary disturbance of the brain impulses.

In minor seizures, or petit mal, the loss of consciousness is momentary. Although there is often a twitching about the eyes or mouth, there is no change of posture, and the person appears to have had no more than a moment of absent-mindedness.

In major seizures, or grand mal, the victim falls to the floor unconscious, often foaming at the mouth, biting, and shaking his limbs violently. Involuntary bowel movements or the passage of urine may occur. The person may hurt himself during such a seizure. Fortunately, people with epilepsy frequently experience a warning, called the aura, before a major attack occurs, and this enables them to lie down and avoid falls.

Ordinary epilepsy is also called genuine epilepsy or idiopathic epilepsy, which means the cause is unknown. This is the most common type, and it is what most people have in mind when they speak of epilepsy. It usually begins early in life. This type of epilepsy is not directly inherited, although a predisposition, or tendency, to it may run in families. While the cause is still unknown, a great deal is known about it, especially in regard to treatment.

Individuals with epilepsy can hold responsible positions and lead practically normal lives, with few restrictions beyond those imposed by having to take medicine and consult their doctors.

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During the middle years, one can reasonably expect a transition from relatively good health to a certain amount of medical trouble. Some of the more common ailments are mentioned below.

Diabetes mellitus

The form of diabetes that begins in middle life is often characterized only by high blood sugar and urine sugar. It is usually treated adequately by diet and medicines taken by mouth, and does not carry the risk of coma that the juvenile form of diabetes does.

Diabetics are, in general, in greater risk of heart disease, high blood pressure, and blood-vessel problems. They should, therefore, be under constant medical supervision.

Cancer

Cancer is a dread disease of the late-middle and older years. Good preventive health practices, such as regular physical examinations, decrease its dangers because the earlier the disease is discovered, the better is the prospect of cure.

Glaucoma

Increased pressure in the eyeball (glaucoma) may eventually lead to blindness. Through regular eye examinations, glaucoma can be detected early, and treatment and cure effected.

Presbyopia

Almost all middle-aged persons become more long-sighted. This results from the lens of the eye becoming more fixed and less able to change its focusing characteristics. Corrective glasses are the only remedy.

Presbycusis

The ageing process in the ear leads to a variable degree of hearing loss, particularly for higher and lower tones.

Emphysema and bronchitis

These are diseases of middle-aged persons with histories of smoking, for the most part. Shortness of breath, due to destruction of lung tissue, and frequent colds and pneumonia characterize these ailments.

Coronary heart disease

The arteries supplying the heart with blood become narrowed because of arteriosclerosis (hardening of the arteries) as we grow into middle age, and this may lead to angina pectoris (severe chest pain on exertion) and heart attack. The risk of heart attack may be lessened by low-fat diet, exercise, relaxation, and cutting out smoking.

Rheumatic heart disease

Rheumatic fever in childhood frequently does not show its destructive effects on the heart until adulthood. In rheumatic heart disease, the valves of the heart become misshapen and the heart is unable to function efficiently. Medicines and surgery are helpful for most of those who suffer from this ailment.

Hypertension

High blood pressure (hypertension) imposes an extra strain on the heart, in particular. It is frequently associated with diabetes. Hypertension, if not treated adequately, can severely damage the heart, brain (as in a stroke), kidneys, and blood vessels. Treatment of hypertension has been one of the great advances in modern medicine.

Congestive heart failure

Heart failure is a sign that the heart is working inefficiently. This may be due to coronary heart disease, valvular damage from rheumatic fever, or other disorders. Heart failure is characterized by fluid accumulation in the body—usually first exhibited in the ankles —and shortness of breath.

Ulcers

Peptic ulcers (those of the stomach and duodenum) cause abdominal pain and discomfort. Diagnosis is most frequently made by X-ray (gastro-intestinal series). Familial tendency and stressful situations are two important factors in the development of ulcers. They can usually be treated by diet and medicines, but in some cases surgery may be necessary.

Hernias

As the body tissues age, they become weaker. A particularly weak part of the body wall and one frequently subjected to stress is the groin area. The bulging of the underlying intestines through an opening in this wall is called a hernia. Treatment is usually by surgery.

Gall bladder disease

Stones and chronic inflammation irritate the gall bladder and prevent it from functioning properly. Since the bile that the gall bladder stores is needed for digestion, particularly of fatty foods, indigestion is a frequent symptom of gall bladder trouble. Emotional upsets as well as excess fatty foods may cause an acute inflammation of the gall bladder, characterized by abdominal pain, fever, and vomiting. Recurrent attacks are an indication for surgical removal of the diseased gall bladder as soon as possible.

Varicose veins

Distended, tortuous veins in the legs are a rather frequent problem of middle age, particularly in women. Varicose veins may be a site for blood clots. In the more extreme types, because blood is not adequately drained from the lower extremities, the overlying skin may get swollen and irritated and break down, forming an ulcer. People with varicose veins frequently complain of pain and fatigue of the legs. Treatment varies from support stockings to surgical removal of the veins.

Disease of blood vessels in the legs

Arteriosclerosis tends to narrow blood vessels in the brain, heart, and extremities. When the vessels conducting blood to the legs become narrowed sufficiently, such symptoms as inability to walk several blocks without severe calf pain become manifest. Sudden occlusion (blocking) of the vessels to the leg by a blood clot may occur. This is a surgical emergency that has to be treated by removing the clot.

Arthritis

Arthritis is an inflammation of the joints. The causes of arthritis vary and the joints affected differ, also. Osteoarthritis is due to wear and tear of the joint tissues with age and use. It is usually not severe or disabling, and develops after 40. Rheumatoid arthritis is a more serious form, for it may produce deformities and serious disabilities.

Prostate gland

In many men over 50, the prostate gland becomes so enlarged that it interferes with the normal passage of urine. Symptoms of this enlargement are frequent urination, decreased stream, difficulty in beginning to urinate, and the need to urinate almost immediately following urination. If symptoms become severe enough, the gland has to be removed surgically, a major but relatively safe operation.

Menopause

The menopause occurs sometime in the forties or fifties. The menstrual flow may stop suddenly; taper off gradually; or stop temporarily, restart, and then taper off. Menopausal symptoms vary from none to discomforting hot flashes and flushes. Symptoms are treated successfully with oestrogens (female sex hormones). Bodily changes may take place after the menopause, such as redistribution of fat, sagging breasts, coarsening of the skin, and weakening of the bones. These changes also respond to oestrogen therapy.

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The deliveries I have discussed are considered normal. Complications of delivery occur when the baby’s position is not normal, or when instruments or an operation must be resorted to for some reason.

Breech babies

Most babies are born head first; this is called the head presentation. In about four out of 100 births, however, the child may emerge feet or buttocks first, in the breech position. This makes little if any difference to the mother, but it is not as easy for the baby. One baby in 100 will lie crosswise in the womb. In this case, the doctor reaches in and turns the baby to a more favourable position. The doctor knows beforehand the type of delivery he faces.

High forceps delivery

In some rare instances, it is necessary, for the safety of the baby or the mother, to hasten delivery before the head has appeared at the opening of the birth canal. The doctor will then reach into the birth canal and draw the baby out with forceps. This procedure has been almost entirely replaced by use of caesarean section (see below).

Caesarean delivery

If, for some reason, the baby cannot be born through the vagina— because the mother is ill, or her pelvic structure is too small—the doctor can perform an operation to remove it through the abdomen.

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Psychosomatic illnesses result from the interaction of the mind and the body. They usually affect only those parts of the body under the control of the involuntary nervous system, such as the digestive tract, the endocrine glands, the heart, the lungs, the bladder, and the skin.

I can best illustrate this by describing an ulcer of the stomach. When food is present in the stomach, digestive juices are produced to digest it. However, certain emotional reactions can also stimulate the flow of these juices. If there is no food in the stomach, the acid juices may irritate the stomach itself and sometimes eventually cause an ulcer, or open sore. It is important to remember that this ulcer exists as an organic disease of the stomach. Unless it is treated by medicine and diet, it may cause a haemorrhage, or it may perforate. However, if the emotional tension is not relieved, the person will not be giving his ulcer its best chance to heal. Of course, he will have to continue his diet and medicine to avoid getting another ulcer. Thus, psychosomatic diseases require treatment of both the body and the mind.

Less dramatic, but at least as important as these diseases in its effects on the body, is everyday stress. When you have to make a physical or emotional effort beyond what is usual for you, you are under stress. Stress can be so serious that a mere tendency to illness may develop into an active health problem, or new illnesses may result. An inadequate education, lack of spare time, lack of privacy, severe pressure on the job—all are stress situations that can affect the body.

In our complex society, it is not possible to remove all causes of stress. It is not desirable, cither, because some degree of stress is often necessary if we are to accomplish specific goals or protect ourselves from danger. The body has many ways of adapting itself to difficult situations, such as increasing the output of the adrenal glands, changing the blood-sugar level, or adjusting the digestive tract. But when a part of the body is overwhelmed by stress and cannot react as it should, or over-reacts, then the resulting ailment is psychosomatic.

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Excess hair can be unattractive, and I don’t blame anyone for wanting to get rid of it. Try bleaching first, using ordinary peroxide to which a drop of ammonia has been added. (Avoid bleaches containing sodium perborate.) The simplest way to remove excess hair is by shaving. If you use an electric razor—there are some made especially for women—your skin will not become tough. Despite what you may have heard, shaving does not encourage the growth of hair or make it coarse. It is better and far easier than rubbing hair off with an abrasive such as pumice, and far less painful than pulling out hairs with tweezers. If there are not too many excess hairs, you can cut them off with a pair of cuticle scissors.

Be very careful about the use of a chemical depilatory on the face; the waxes are safer, though painful. If you do use a chemical depilatory on your body, be very careful not to get it into your eyes. Always try it on a small spot of skin to see whether it is irritating. Do not use one more often than once every two weeks, and discontinue immediately if the skin becomes inflamed or itches.

None of these depilatories will remove hair permanently. The only permanent method is electrolysis, involving the insertion of a tiny needle into the hair follicle.

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